Some of my father's and my father's father's wisdom:

  "No rule of the inanimate."
  "A good donkey always carries a load."
  "Two farmers know the price of a cow."
  "If you plan far ahead, you can do it again."
  "White horses take a lot of straw."

Some theses on life I had at one time or another:

  "It is easy enough to water on people, watering someone, on the other hand, is quite a different matter." 
  "In terms of gratification, duration and intensity are not reciprocal." 
  "Going up seems better than going down looks bad." 
(Or why being a bull is more intuitive than being a bear.)
  "There is no shortcut to happiness." 
  "To improve beyond your ability, failure is the only option." 
  "To err is divine." 
(Seeing the less than perfect world or considering evolution, a process of trial and error, to be related to divinity.)
  "Fudgy Logic."
  "Take-off is against the wind."
  "It is not whether you would if you could; it is whether you would if you had to choose."
  "Stereotyping is in the eye of the beholder."
  "How is a quantum leap a big step?"
  "All they talk about is intellectual intercourse, but they do not realize the pains of delivering a comprehensive idea."
  "The acceptance of telepathy as the sixth primary sense by Nashvillians is most explicit in their traffic behavior." 
  "Now that medicine has stopped evolution, genetic engineering is to continue (complete) it." 
(Random thought while having one of my wisdom-teeth pulled.)
  "Constraints determine success."
  "If the objective of running is to stay young, then, based on the theory of relativity, it is better to cover actual distance than to run on a treadmill."  
  "Integrity is the best policy." 
  "Considering the public watching the Miss America pageant, based on the commercials shown, this show can hardly be regarded sexist." 
  "Discipline shows through change, not over time."
  "Given the overwhelming amount of beautiful people on t.v., then, judging by the law suits against discrimination, ugly people must be a real-life majority." 
  "The fading distinction between marketing and law is observed when parents tell their child it should become a lawyer because it speaks so well." 
  "Given the current status of hardware and software, you should probably speak of my 'sixthgrader.'" 
  "No two berries from one bush taste the same." 
  "Today's most exciting event: They changed the soap in the restroom..."
  "Why do not we let it die to see whether it could have lived." 
  "So it takes MS Word 6.0a longer to load a 500k rtf document on a 66MHz, 486, 16MB machine than for Procol Harum to perform A Whiter Shade of Pale on a Lloyds Clock radio."
  "Verification is intelligence." 
  "A diamond ring: If the vow has no value, the token had better." 
  "I used to think it would not take much to keep a highway clean, until I saw the stretch adopted by a fraternity." 
  "It is hard to believe that printing three small pictures, each with one line of explanatory text, can give you the same sense of accomplishment as writing VB 3.0 code to change the cursor in MS Windows." 
Pieter J. Mosterman